A Good Cry

Two posts in a week... what is the world coming to?!

I knew today would be a bit tough, as it's the anniversary of Charley's passing. I'm going to include something I wrote just over a year ago, before Charley passed away. Truth is, I probably won't even read it- it's tough. But then again, maybe I will... I could kind of use a good cry about him right now. It's nice to get it out once in awhile, and being a woman, I haven't had a 'good' cry in a long time. (Anyone that knows me should know I'm a crier, so saying that it's been a long time actually means weeks- maybe even months. That's a long time for me!)

Here goes nothing. I'll try to end on a happy note again at the end.

*****
May 7th, 2010

This is just so hard. You grow so attached to something, knowing that it won’t be around forever. But something so special… Charley has been nothing short of amazing in the almost 6 years we’ve had him. Everywhere I go, something reminds me of him. When I drop food on the ground, no matter where I am, I always think of him and how he’d be right there to clean it up if he could. French fries will probably always make me think of him because it was something he always begged for and always got. I will miss the way his butt wiggled and how he could never walk straight because he was always so full of excitement and joy. He was by far the happiest dog I have ever met, and I’m really glad to say he was mine. He never met a person he didn’t like… except for maybe that one creepy guy at the park in South Carolina. I remember the man calling to Charley, but he didn’t leave my side. He never barked or growled at anyone. In fact, he only barked and growled in his sleep, unless his Kong fell under something and he needed to get our attention. Never growled, though. And he only bit us when he was a puppy. Even when his ears were infected and it hurt to clean them out, he never bit. His spirit was like a magnet- people would just gravitate toward him, even if they were scared of big dogs. He has always acted like a puppy, and most people wouldn’t believe he was almost 6 years old… the only give away was the gray in his muzzle.

Charley’s favorite things were:

1) Peanut Butter (which we had to say in code, otherwise he would start drooling)

2) Kong, which he would drop in our laps or on the bed, covered in Charley Slime

3) People food. I will thank Grandma Harding for that one. ;)

4) Walks

5) “His People” at Petsmart

6) The dog park in South Carolina

7) Anytime we would say “Go” or “Bye bye”

8) Getting his butt scratched, especially when you were in the bathroom because he knew you’d be sitting down anyway so you might as well scratch!

9) 3 Dog Bakery in Columbia, SC. Always had a blast there.

10) Doing tricks. Sit, shake, wave, high 5, low 5, dance, stay, leave it… hide and seek.

11) White rice, especially Japanese sticky rice.

12) Whipped cream

13) LICKING. Some people didn’t like to be around him because he would lick so much, but usually it was an endearing quality about Charley. He was such a friendly guy.

Some favorite memories:

1) Charley coming out of the door, the first pup to greet us when we were picking one out at the breeder. He picked us. And I will always be thankful for that.

2) Thinking that something was wrong with him when I first saw him, but finding out later that the reason his fur was matted on his head was because he’d gotten into tree sap.

3) The first night he was home with us, and he was crying in his crate. Casey had to hold me outside the door to his room because I had a hard time hearing him cry. Funny how similar it is now with Keaton.

4) The first time he climbed up on the couch. He wanted SO badly to be up there with us, and we kept yelling, “You can do it, buddy!” Then he made it up there and curled up with us.

5) The kid learned tricks so quickly that I forgot how I taught him things. I think ‘shake’ was his first trick. He was so excited when he did it and got praise for it that he would do it all the time.

6) He loved chasing lizards on our screened-in porch. I think I still have video of him playing with them.

7) He ate a pecan and it got stuck in his tummy. We had to go to the vet, and they had to go through the ‘back door’ to see what was happening. I am pretty sure I cried when he did… his little eyes bugged out of his head. Mine would have, too.

8) The time our friend Jose gave him beer… he ended up peeing on my friend Jenny’s foot. I remember walking into our house to see my puppy’s face in a Dixie cup, slurping up the beer. He’s never had it again, but always wanted some whenever Casey was drinking it.

9) The way he kept sliding on the floor of our kitchen in our first house in SC, and would end up bumping into something and scaring himself.

10) Scaring himself at Swearingen while chasing a Palmetto bug and barking at it, then flattening out on the ground when his bark echoed and sounded like a bunch of other dogs barking. He was so freaked out!!

11) Playing ball with him in the courtyard at Swearingen.

12) Taking him to visit Casey in the lab, and having him run up and down the hallway. He scared so many of the foreign students. One Chinese student wouldn’t come out of the bathroom until Charley was gone.

13) Having him sit in the front seat of the VW, and pulling up to stop lights. People would always glance over at him and laugh or smile.

14) The way he scared a girl at Sonic, and she refused to bring us our food because she thought he would bite her.

15) Having brunch with Casey and Charley at The Gourmet Shop in Columbia.

16) Charley’s first plane ride to Kansas. Leaving him with my parents while we were in Japan was one of the hardest things I’ve done so far, next to this. It was really hard to say goodbye to him. I feel that pain again now.

17) Seeing his daily ‘puppy dreams’.

18) The way he and Melanie, our neighbor’s daughter, would get so incredibly excited when they would see each other! “Charley Brown” was one of her first phrases.

19) His soft coat. We would get compliments on it all the time. He really was soft, and I think it happened even before we started giving him peanut butter.

20) I never knew dogs could get allergies until Charley came along.

21) The way he would walk up to the baby’s swing and push it with his nose, or give my pregnant belly little kisses before “Peanut” was born.

22) Last night, hanging out with my boys on our bed. Keaton had his hand on Charley and looked like he was really feeling Charley’s fur. He also smiled at him while in his bouncy seat last night.

23) The talent show at Three Dog Bakery where Charley decided not to do any tricks. He still got second place. 

24) Running circles around him when he got fixed because the huge cone around his neck hit the ground and scared the crap out of him… he literally would not move. I had to walk him into the house one paw at a time.

25) Sitting with Charley and Casey on our porch swing in SC, getting him through his first thunderstorm.

26) “Blue”, the toy octopus. He went through at least 2 if not 3 of those. Ripped them to shreds.

27) Getting trapped in bed between Charley and Casey, both of whom were snoring.

28) How high the kid could jump!!

29) Charley in Charleston… afraid of the waves.

30) Charley being in love with Mya… and running in circles for 3 hours the night before he got fixed.

31) Charley running to the door or window whenever I say “Daddy’s home!”
*****

I don't blame you if you already stopped reading this. I made the mistake of reading it and am barely able to see the computer screen through my tears. But you know what? I am just thankful that he was in our lives, and I'm thankful he's not in pain anymore. BEST DOG EVER.

Well, I think that's more than enough emotion from me for one day. Here's a happier note for you- one of my favorite pictures of Charley and Keaton together: