Keatonisms

Happy Keatonism Tuesday!
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"He's not going to lift heavy weights, he's going to lift paper weights because those aren't heavy."

First sarcastic sentence (that I've heard, anyway...) "Well, I'm glad I got crumbs all over me."

He got a wedding cake cupcake: "Can I have my marriage cake now?"

"I'm heavier than I used to be, because I love to grow."

While sitting on my back, "I'm switching your bones around where they're supposed to be."