Oh, anxiety, how you plague me. I just started really looking into going back to school... again, only a few weeks before school STARTS, but I digress... and my anxiety is on the rise. I think it's the thought of really going back and leaving Keaton with someone that makes me nervous. Or maybe it's actually getting something completed that has me on edge, I don't know for sure. Either way, this little voice in my head keeps telling me to give up, but I can't listen. I've listened to that voice more than enough and have nothing much (academically) to show for it.
One thing at a time. First, I have to figure out if the college still has me in the system, or if I've been gone too long and have to reapply. It's only been 2 years... but that seems like forever ago! Last time I was there, I was 7 months pregnant and waddling up and down the hallway to my Photoshop class. Now, I can't even remember what my username/password combination was to sign in and see what classes I have taken. Mom Brain? I think so. I hope so. But I honestly sat here for 2 minutes trying to remember the semesters I was even IN college last. 2008? 2009? Did I go from Spring to Fall? Sadly, I can't remember. (Maybe I blogged about it... hmmm.....)
Anyway, I am really trying not to listen to that annoying little voice in my head, and actually push through and get this started. I know this is the hardest part. But those "What Ifs" Shel Silverstein talked about are crawling inside my head and making me second guess everything.
-Ash
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