Prepping for "Snowpocalypse" 2011

30 Day Photo Challenge, Day 13: A photo of one of your favorite movies:

This one is difficult because 1) I watch a lot of movies, and 2) I have trouble making decisions, so deciding on one movie is tough!

Fright Night! Word on the web is that they're remaking it, and Colin Ferrell is playing the vampire neighbor. I think that may be the only reason I watch the new one, because I love the old one so much, I am sure the remake will not do it justice. Either way, though... I love vampire movies and this is one I could watch over and over again!

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Day 14: A photo of your best friend(s):

Lindsey, Sara and I at Ben's wedding a year ago... (I was 4 months preggo at the time). I always have fun with these girls. Lindsey and I have been best friends since we were 5, and Sara and I became friends in middle school... then the two met, and are now inseparable. They always make me laugh, listen to my rambling stories, and are always there whenever I need them. I miss these girls a ton and I wish I lived closer to home so I could see them more often. Seeing them over coffee whenever we go back to Topeka is one of the highlights of my time at home!

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In other news, "Snowpocalypse" is apparently making its way to Chicago in the next 24 hours. They are predicting up to 2 feet of the white stuff, and I am NOT excited at all. I decided to go to Walmart this morning, along with all the other crazy people, and stock up on a few things before it hits. I drove around for almost 20 minutes just looking for a parking place! I expected nothing less than the chaos I witnessed there, but I wish it wouldn't have taken 2 hours to get what I needed. It was not a fun trip.

By the time we left, Keaton was long overdue for a nap. Napping was another story today. In the past few days he's figured out how to sit up, pull himself up to standing, and then cruise around his crib. Since he's not able to sit himself down yet, I have to go in multiple times to lay him back down, which breaks his little heart. Then a minute later, he's up again. I ended up giving up and had him nap with me in our bed so he would finally settle down. Then late this afternoon, it took me 45 minutes to get him to fall asleep, and he didn't get there until almost 5 p.m., so I don't know what I'm in for tonight. It's just a stage... just a stage.

Here goes nothing. I sincerely hate snow right now. I feel bad for Casey because for months now he has looked forward to the Avenged Sevenfold concert tomorrow night in Moline, IA... I highly doubt it's going to happen at this rate. I hope for his sake that they reschedule it so he doesn't have to miss out. I also hope that my Mom's cataract surgery goes well tomorrow morning. Mother Nature is not being very accommodating right now! I hope this gets it out of her system so the weekend of the 12th is snow free... I would hate to have to cancel Keaton's birthday party or have our family's travel plans get screwed up! Grrr... Mother Nature!

-Ash

Me again...

Okay, so much for 'not blogging' this weekend... LOL... a few things before I hit the hay...

1. Keaton has enough hair now (finally) that Casey gave him a tiny mohawk during lunch today... here is the result!
2. Keaton enjoys laughing when others laugh now. We were visiting friends and having a funny conversation, and Keaton just joined in laughing like he got what was so funny. LOVE it!
3. Tonight he tried beef, shrimp, and tofu, and liked it all. Yay!
4. He figured out how to stand up in his crib today, and now he won't stop. I had to go in twice this evening to lay him back down after he was supposed to be asleep. I will probably regret saying this, but it was kind of funny to walk into his room and see his little head peeking over the crib. He gets so excited about his accomplishments, too! What am I in for now? I guess we'll find out! 
5. He started dancing and bobbing his head when our 5 year old friend Vivian was playing piano... haha!
6. He is really remembering a ton of things this week! I can show him something, wait a few minutes, and then quiz him on it and he will point to it. He also says Hi all the time now. Have I mentioned how much I enjoy this stage?

I think that's all for today. And maybe this weekend. I just can't blog enough lately because he's doing so many things, I don't want to forget anything!! (Did I mention tooth #7 came in last week? We now have 5 on top, 2 on bottom.. and working on a bunch more.) Until next time...

-Ash

Day 12

30 Day Photo Challenge, Day 12: A photo of when you were happy:



Saturday May 24th, 2003. I can't believe it's been almost 8 years now! Time sure does fly. We've had ups and downs, just like all married couples do... I'm just so glad that we've gotten through them all and now have a beautiful little boy to share our life with, too.

My parents are celebrating their 50th anniversary this June. Fifty years!! That is a wonderful accomplishment, and something they should be proud to share, because not many people get to that point- especially in today's society. I am excited for them, and hope to be able to say the same someday. :)

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Little Man is asleep next to me in bed right now. I don't like letting him nap in our bed much these days, but he was super grumpy and would not settle down to sleep, and it was the only thing that would work. So here I am, stuck in our room. Might as well blog, right? I think we screwed up his schedule last night- we went to Red Lobster for dinner, and didn't get home until about 30 minutes after his bedtime. He went to sleep fine, but woke up an hour earlier than normal this morning, and refused to go back to sleep until about an hour ago. He also figured out how to pull himself up on his crib this morning, so during the first attempt to get him to nap, he stood up, cruised to the end of his crib, and started playing with a full-length mirror that was propped up there. I heard a banging noise and came in to discover him standing there, squeaking at me in delight at his accomplishment. That was the final straw- Case lowered the crib a few inches. Luckily it's not too low for me- yet. Unless I hit a growth spurt of my own, the next one's going to be tough.

We let Keaton eat bits of our food last night at RL- he really liked the chicken Casey had. Didn't try giving him shellfish, just in case he has an allergy, but he liked the Cheddar Bay biscuits (who doesn't?), broccoli, and mashed potatoes, too. It's fun to be able to give him what we have. He's growing up so fast!! This morning for breakfast he had yogurt, and finished almost 1/2 a pear all by himself. Then he saw Casey eating a banana and had to have some of that, too. He saw me eating a cupcake the other day, so I gave him a tiny bite to prep him for his birthday cake in a few weeks. A few weeks?! Ahhhhhhh!!!! Breathe, woman, breathe!!

Alright, I guess that's enough for one day. It seems I have gotten the writing bug again because I really thought I wouldn't write until next week, and I've posted 3 times since then. Is anyone else still reading this (besides my parents?)... LOL...

-Ash

My Stupid Mouth.

Great John Mayer song, and pretty much sums up my evening.

Don't you hate it when you have very good intentions, but the perception gets completely screwed up/taken out of context, etc, and you end up feeling like a complete idiot? That's how I feel right now. I won't get into specifics, but it's one of those times I wish I had that good ole Remote Control for life and I could either pause and rethink how things could be taken, or rewind to say it differently... or fast forward to the part where everything has blown over and my stupidity is only a memory. Until the next time.

Maybe I'm being too dramatic. It wouldn't be the first time. But I really am flustered at the fact that I can so easily get myself into trouble when I talk. Sometimes when it happens, I picture myself stepping in a big pile of poo, with cleats on. That's what it feels like to me, because it is not an easy clean up. It's not an "Oh, I'm sorry, I said that wrong" kind of moment. It's an intricate, complicated moment. Like an onion. It's got lots of layers and it gets stronger and smells worse the deeper you go. Enough smelly examples... you get the idea.

That's my night in a nutshell. I think I should quit while I'm ahead... start fresh tomorrow. Fresh sounds good after referencing piles of poo and onions, don't you think? Hahaha...

-Ash

The Perfect Cheer

30 Day Photo Challenge, Day 11: A photo of a night you loved

Halloween, 2005: It was about a week before we left to live in Japan (4 months for me, 6 for Casey), and was probably my most favorite Halloween ever. Casey and I learned a Halloween cheer that we found online that was from one of the SNL skits (which I just searched for to share with you, but to no avail). Everywhere we went, people would ask us to do the cheer, and after we finished people would buy us a drink. Needless to say, by the end of the evening, I could not remember the cheer very well. Casey rocked it out, though, and we had a blast! He really let loose and had fun with it. My Mom helped us make the costumes. Great night with great friends. :)

Keaton took a great nap after mall walking this morning, but pretty much refused to sleep for the last hour and 15 minutes, even though he was showing all the signs of being sleepy. I think he may actually (finally) be asleep now... after a long bought of hiccups. Are hiccups really a sign of growing in babies? He's gotten them at least once a day every day this week. Just wondered. We are actually going to lower his crib this weekend... for the second time this week, I put him in the Pack N Play and ran downstairs to get laundry out of the dryer, and when I came back up, he had pulled himself up again. He was pretty pleased with himself. I am still unsure why he hasn't figured out how to do it in his own crib yet, but I'm thankful (and so is my back) that he hasn't so far... but now is the time to lower it. :-/

I am ready for the weekend. I am ready for Casey to be home, and to go to Downers Grove tomorrow and visit our friends who are celebrating the Chinese New Year. I look forward to some delicious Chinese food, and getting to see a few friends and their kids. They are both girls, so Keaton should be pretty happy about that. :) I may not blog for a few days, but I'll be sure to update the 30 day photos next time.

-Ash

Curious George and Owl Cupcakes

30 Day Photo Challenge, Day 10: A photo you like for any reason

My little monkey watching Curious George. :)

He is kind of enthralled with Curious George right now. Every time he sees CG on TV, he squeaks! I normally let him watch a 15 minute episode every day, especially when I need to do something like switch out the laundry or take a shower. I normally put him in the Pack N Play, but he gets so glued to the tube that I come back a minute or two later and he hasn't moved... at all. I may not win any kind of Mother of the Year award for letting my kid watch a little TV before he's 2... but I kind of doubt I'm screwing him up, either. If he's anything like his Daddy, and we all know he is already, then he's going to have an affinity toward all things electronic... I'll just be sure not to overdo it.

So I gave the birthday cupcakes a test run the other night, and finally uploaded pictures. Here's a preview:

I didn't realize how difficult it is to break Oreos apart without screwing up the frosting in the middle. The commercials make it look SO easy. Jerks. It's really not, unless there's some kind of trick to it that I don't know about. I went through a bunch of mini Oreos just to get a few that looked decent, but even then I think these owls look a bit cracked out. LOL... I may have to go for Plan B- white icing. I thought the Oreo idea was brilliant when I saw it on a recipe online, but I am no Martha Stewart, and don't have a great track record when it comes to making things look super nice. I'm glad to have done a test run, though, so it should make the real thing go a bit easier.

It's snowing again. It's supposed to snow the next few days, too. Keaton and I watched the snow today while we ate lunch. Last night I made teriyaki salmon, sticky rice, and edamame. Keaton enjoyed trying all 3 items, and seemed to like the salmon the best, which surprised me! At lunch today I gave him some more rice and edamame, and he ended up chewing the edamame into little bits and sucking on them for almost 45 minutes. He would just hold the pieces in his mouth for a long, long time, and I wouldn't realize he was still eating them until he would laugh or talk and a little green piece would fly out of his mouth. Silly kid! I guess Case did something similar with his food when he was a kid, so I shouldn't be too surprised. Still, though, I wish he would just swallow it because I always worry about him choking while he's playing! Not to mention the fact that he leaves a little trail of edamame chunks all over the place when he crawls around.

He's also been chatting up a storm the past few days. I'm trying to only give him the pacifier when he's about to take a nap, so he's not as dependent on it. So far it's working. He has been doing long strings of babbling, mainly saying Dada, Mama, and babababababahhhh! Today we played an extended game of 'Where's the ___?' He's really getting good at knowing where things are, and pointing. I think this may be my favorite game so far... he's learning a ton right now! Such a neat little kid. :)

Well, this Mommy's going to try and take a little nap while Keaton's asleep so I can get some bit of energy for tonight. I've been doing housework in the evenings while Casey works, and today will be no exception because I am super tired, for some reason. More tomorrow!

-Ash
I

Little Me, Day 9

30 Day Photo Challenge, Day 9: A photo of yourself when you were a baby

Grandma Billings and I. I'm not sure how old I was in this one, but I'm guessing ~1 month. I am starting to see a resemblance between Keaton and I when I look at pictures of myself as a child. I wonder if he'll have curly hair like I did?

This morning we had swimming lessons. Keaton was tired, but he still had a blast in the pool. All he wants to do is splash now when he's in the water, which makes it hard for people to want to stand next to us because everyone gets wet, if he has his way! I took a shower yesterday, but last night when I was giving Keaton a bath I basically got another one... he splashes constantly and wouldn't stop until I gave him a toy to distract him for a moment or two. It's hard to bathe a kid when you keep getting water in your face! He also keeps pulling himself up on the side of the tub, so I have to be extra careful with him and make sure he's got a good grip. Needless to say, maybe I should wait until after his bath before I take a shower, because I got soaked pretty well in the process. I should have taken a picture of myself last night after his bath... I looked like a wet dog. Second thought, maybe it's good that I didn't... haha...

Poor Casey got home around 11 last night. I'm glad he didn't have to pull an all-nighter, but it's still too bad that he had to stay so late. This morning when he got up for work, Keaton woke up, too. We hung out with Casey as he got ready to leave, and helped make his breakfast, etc. Keaton enjoyed seeing him, and couldn't really figure out why he had to leave again. When Casey was about to walk out the door, Keaton squeaked "HI!" and reached out to him. I know that made it harder for him to leave, because he came back in and hugged Keaton one more time. I think it's going to be even harder when he learns to say "Bye bye" or if he starts to get upset when one of us has to leave. And Casey knows he'll get an excited "HI!" when he comes back home tonight... that probably makes it worth it.

Not much else is going on here. I am ready for the weekend again... which seems sad since I don't go to work or anything. It's just nice to have Casey home, and to enjoy time as a family. I look forward to days when Case actually gets to relax and not think about work. Hopefully his current project will go better than it has been lately, and he won't have to be at work babysitting equipment or running tests. It's almost like Grad school again right now- I know he is really stressed. It would be great if things start slowing down soon and he is able to take a little bit of a break.

I'm in another writing slump today, so I think I'll end for now. Sounds like Keaton is going to wake up soon anyway- he slept for at least an hour after swimming... YAY! His naps seem to be longer these days, which is nice. I just need to take more advantage of the time I have, which is hard to do after swimming because it wears me out, too! More later, of course. :)

-Ash

Pointing and Pictures

30 Day Photo Challenge, Day 8: A photo of something I enjoy doing

I think this one may be obvious, but for those of you wondering... I like to take pictures!! Anyone who has ever visited my Flickr site should know this. Heck, anyone who has ever met me should know it, too. I love hiding behind the camera. I still have a ton to learn, and I have some trouble keeping the technical details straight sometimes, but it is definitely one of my passions in life. I look forward to continuing my education in photography, and maybe someday start my own business. Who knows?

Not in much of a writing mood tonight, I wonder what's wrong with me! It was just a typical Tuesday. The highlight of today was Keaton (as it tends to be)... he is pointing at everything now! I can ask him where things are and he'll point his cute little finger in their direction... most of the time. (He sometimes gives up and just points at whatever he thinks looks interesting.) He can point to all the owls in his room. He points at the clock and the light all the time now. He can show me where different animals are on his crib sheets, different pictures in books, and even where my belly button is! This stage is too much fun!

Tomorrow is Swimming Day- hopefully our instructor is back because Keaton always seems to learn a lot with her. Other than that, we don't have much planned for the day. Guess that's about all for tonight!

-Ash

Catching Up

30 Day Photo Challenge, Day 6: A photo of someone you love

Casey and Charley Brown. Today is the 7 month anniversary of the day we had to say goodbye to Chuck. I thought it would be appropriate to include both my boys before Keaton came along, as Keaton has had a lot of the spotlight so far in the 30 Day Challenge... for good reason, of course! This is the first picture of Casey and Charley together. <3

Day 7: A photo of something I stand for.
This one is stumping me. What do I stand for? How many almost-30-year-olds have a solid answer to this one?

I guess this one would work: Being a Mother. If I had a business card, it would be my title. I think I have always been a bit of a "Little Mama"... especially when I worked at USC and had my summer REU students- I was known as the "Den Mother" around the Chemical Engineering Department. While I don't know if I fully answered the question of 'what I stand for', this is what I would define myself as... a Mother. Hardest, most rewarding job I have ever had. :)

Now for the update. The weekend flew by, as it always does. Now it's Monday again, and 5 more days until I get to spend time with Casey again (for an extended period of time). Since he spent half of Saturday at work, I guess I feel like this weekend was even shorter, because I don't think I define it as a 'weekend' until he's home. Yesterday was the Chicago Bears/Green Bay Packers football game, so we drove to Evanston to see our friends Misael & Aidaris and their daughter, aka Keaton's girlfriend. He is absolutely in love with her, and it's cute to watch them together. She just turned 2 last month, so she can obviously run circles around him, but I think she likes interacting with him... and I know he loves attention from her! Last night she gave him little kisses on his cheeks and head, and fed him rice with a spoon. (Why did I not get that on video?! It was so cute!!) He grinned from ear to ear every time she spoke. He always wanted to be where ever she was. He also fell in love with her walker, and decided that he would not walk, but almost jog with it. This is the most he has ever walked while holding onto something... he was probably motivated because she is a very active child, so he has to work hard to keep up! All that exercise wore Keaton out, so he passed out in the car on the way home. I did the same not too long after we got home. And with that, the weekend was over.

Today Keaton and I went to my Orthodontist consultation. He did great, and enjoyed watching all the hygienists in the office (probably because they were all women) and did his share of flirting. I found out that I do not qualify for Invisalign like I'd hoped, but I can get braces with the help of Casey's insurance. It should only take a year. We'll see how it all pans out.

Well the kid is awake now and calling for me from his crib, so it's time for me to go. More later!

-Ash

Day 5/Numb

30 Day Photo Challenge, Day 5: A photo that makes me laugh:



I call this one "Saftey first, spell-check second". It was taken at a construction site in Columbia, SC when we lived there. I still cannot believe someone printed this without knowing that it was spelled wrong! Hahahaa...

So going through 3 hours of pushing during labor really puts things into perspective. Take this morning, for example... I had to get 4 fillings. I thought it was only going to be two, but I was wrong. My mouth is still numb with Novocaine... so glad that's over. I look forward to getting feeling back in my face so I can eat some lunch eventually! Anyway, labor really puts other pain to shame!

I've got a very cuddly little man today. Whenever I put him down, he crawls up to me and needs to be in my lap. Maybe he knows the morning I had and wants to give support, I dunno! It's cute, but tough when I have to use the bathroom or something because he gets upset when I put him down. Not sure why he's like that today, but hopefully he'll want to do the same with Casey when he gets home from work (yes, on a Saturday... poor guy) so I can take some ibuprofen and a nap.

More later!

-Ash

Thinking warm thoughts... Day 4

30 Day Photo Challenge, Day 4: A place I would like to go visit:

On this bitterly cold, dreary Chicago day, I would LOVE LOVE LOVE to be in the Galapagos Islands. They never have to worry about -20 degree wind chill. Or snow. Or... anything, or so it seems. As Liz Lemon would say, "I want to go to there!" I don't know why I've been thinking about it so much lately, but I can't help myself... I'm obsessed. Absolutely beautiful!!

In other news, Keaton decided that today would be the day he pulled himself up in his crib. He hasn't figured out how to sit up on his own while laying down yet, but we are too close for comfort right now, so I think Casey is going to have to lower the crib this weekend. I knew this day would come, but now the toughest part comes for me- getting my kid in and out of his bed. 1) I'm super short. 2) He's on the heavy side. It is hard for me to get the leverage I need to put him in bed without dropping him, or pick him up without a step stool... so that's my only option, unless Casey puts hydraulics on the bed or we get a lever/pulley system going. Since those are highly unrealistic, I will have to resort to the stool. It's too bad I can't still get a growth spurt.

Well, laundry calls, and Keaton's taking a pretty good nap right now, so I'll take advantage. I have a dentist appointment tomorrow to get a few fillings... yay. Can't wait. Blah! Oh well, it's better to get it over with. Then I meet with an orthodontist on Monday morning to see what can be done... hopefully everything will work out and I will have straight teeth in the very near future!

-Ash

Day 3/Weird start

Day 3: A Photo that makes you happy. (I have to pick just one?!)

This picture makes me smile every time I see it, so I think it qualifies... but there are so many more I could add to this category! If you look at the picture at the top of my blog, that qualifies, too. And if you go on my Flickr website... well, there are about 10,000 and counting, and a ton of them qualify. So I think I've got this category covered.

Today started out pretty strange. After Keaton woke up around 5 to eat, he fell back to sleep, and so did I. I set my alarm to get up so we could go mall walking. Next thing I know, it's 7:30, and we are both still in our pajamas and are supposed to be at the mall in 30 minutes. I rushed around the house, and by the time I got us both in the car, it was 8:15. Then I couldn't find my keys. I found them (in my coat pocket) and then backed out of the driveway- and into our trash can. I guess I forgot to take my anti-idiot pill this morning!

Luckily the afternoon went better. After 3.5 hours at the mall, walking and shopping, I came home and Keaton took about an hour nap. Case came home around 5, and I made Peachy Sausage Bake for dinner. Other than that, just a typical cold evening in Chicago. I don't think we're going to leave the house tomorrow if we don't have to, because the high is supposed to be 9. The HIGH. 9. I need to move to a warmer place. Galapagos Islands, anyone?

-Ash

Milestones aplenty!

Today Keaton:

• Fed me a Cheerio
• Sang into a microphone after watching me do it once
• Kicked his feet during swim class
• Took a 2 hour nap!!
• Drank from a sippy cup, and liked it! Not much, but it was noteworthy.
• Pulled himself up on his airplane, and later walked with it on his own! (He also fell over it, but we're talking about the good points, right? He didn't cry, though!)
• Clapped after watching Casey do it

I'm pretty sure I'm forgetting something, but really, that's enough. He had a really good day today! I can't believe how much he's learning right now! There I go again with those darn exclamation points!!!!!

-Ash

Day 2

30 Day Photo Challenge, Day 2: A picture of myself at least a year ago.

This is one of the last pics of Charley and I (posing every week of the pregnancy) before Keaton was born. Speaking of Keaton, he is doing great in swimming this session, and is learning a ton. Today he started kicking! He must have used a lot of energy, or the lack of sleep from last night is catching up with him, because he's been sleeping since noon and it's almost 1:40 pm right now! Yay!!

Another random note... I use exclamation points too much. All the time. It's bad when I annoy myself! There I go again.

That's all for now... I'll probably write more tonight.

-Ash

30 Day Photo Challenge/Nightly Blog

I saw this on Facebook recently so I think I'm going to try it. It's a 30 day photo challenge, which is of course right up my alley. Plus, it might add a little more to the blog since lately it's been a ton of words and not the fun pics I used to post so often. Let's fix that!

Day 1: A photo of me. I would love to tell you that I took a picture today and that I liked it, however, that is not true. I've tried taking pictures of myself lately, but I am super critical and therefore have nothing to show... so I'll post one that is not horrible (but a bit cheesy) that was taken at our Mom's Night Out last Friday, and try to get a better one sometime soon.

In other news, I thought I would continue with the nightly blog. I thought today about something that bugged me recently, but I feel a little guilty about it. Saturday I kept hearing this loud banging noise every few minutes, and then occasionally I would hear a high-pitched squeal. I heard it a few times and didn't really think much of it, but when Keaton went down for his afternoon nap, I heard it again and again. I wrote the squealing noise off as a sound effect that was on Casey's computer game. But the banging noise kept happening. It started to really drive me nuts, so I walked out to the living room to see what was going on. Casey had no clue about it, and it turns out that neither noise was coming from his game, so I peeked out the window. Turns out, the neighborhood boys were playing hockey in our driveway; The banging noise was the puck hitting the house, and the squealing was the boys celebrating a goal. I really tried not to get upset, but it kind of frustrated me that they didn't ask, and that they were hitting the house. Most of all, it torked me off when it woke Keaton up from his nap. Call me a grumpy old lady, but I was fuming about it for awhile, especially when Keaton wouldn't go back to sleep and was not in a very good mood. Casey pointed out that they are just kids, and that I have a soon-to-be rambunctious little guy who will probably be just like that, which put things into perspective. Still, I keep thinking about it. I think I would have felt better about it if they knocked on the door and asked, and even more so if they had not kept hitting the house. And if they had not woken up Keaton. I'll get over it, but I had to get it out. And yes, I feel very old now for complaining about it.

In another random note, I figured out that I would very much like to visit the Galapagos Islands someday. Preferably sooner than later. I saw Ecuador on a list of the top 10 places with 'perfect weather', and saw a link to the Islands, so I clicked on it. Of course, seeing the pictures of wildlife- especially turtles- piqued my interest, and I fell in love. I believe that if I could picture what Heaven looks like, it is there. So, my newest goal is to someday go there, take pictures, lay on the beach, and explore. When I eventually get to sleep tonight, I hope that's where I end up in my dreams.

Alrighty, that's enough for tonight. :)

-Ash

Old Habits Die Hard

There are some really bad habits I have gotten into- especially with the arrival of winter- that I need to try and overcome, like:

1. Napping. I normally try to in the morning if Keaton goes back to sleep, but lately I've done it in the afternoon, too. And you may think that it would have an effect on my sleep at night, [see last night's post] but it actually doesn't. I have a hard time falling asleep no matter when or where... but I LOVE to sleep!! I just need need to get a better handle on how often I do it!
2. Eating too much sugar. This has always been a problem for me. I still curse Oreos for leaving their chocolatey cookie remnants in your teeth as evidence, because I remember getting busted eating them as a kid and I lied through my chocolate-spotted teeth that I hadn't had any of them. Doh!! My sweet tooth is ridiculous, and probably has one of those big, silver fillings in it.
3. Checking Facebook too much. It is so freaking addictive. I love reading people's status updates, looking at pictures, and getting feedback on my own. I think maybe that's one thing I do really enjoy about Facebook- the feedback. My biggest affinity to FB is that it helps me keep in touch with people... in the laziest, most self-indulgent way. I don't judge people that are on it a lot, because I am right there with them!

These are probably the worst right now. I don't necessarily have a plan on how to change them yet, but I thought writing them down would be a good start. :)

-Ash

Whatifs & Worry

I think I'm going to attempt to start blogging at night, right before I go to bed. I tend to have a lot of crap on my mind at night, and I toss and turn for 30+ minutes thinking and overthinking about... well... everything. Keaton. Things I said. Things other people said. Keaton. Casey. Things I didn't do but needed to. Things I did but didn't need to. Keaton. I can worry about anything and everything, and tend to do it nightly. It reminds me of the Shel Silverstein poem:

Whatif
Last night, while I lay thinking here,
some Whatifs crawled inside my ear
and pranced and partied all night long
and sang their same old Whatif song:
Whatif I'm dumb in school?
Whatif they've closed the swimming pool?
Whatif I get beat up?
Whatif there's poison in my cup?
Whatif I start to cry?
Whatif I get sick and die?
Whatif I flunk that test?
Whatif green hair grows on my chest?
Whatif nobody likes me?
Whatif a bolt of lightning strikes me?
Whatif I don't grow tall?
Whatif my head starts getting smaller?
Whatif the fish won't bite?
Whatif the wind tears up my kite?
Whatif they start a war?
Whatif my parents get divorced?
Whatif the bus is late?
Whatif my teeth don't grow in straight?
Whatif I tear my pants?
Whatif I never learn to dance?
Everything seems well, and then
the nighttime Whatifs strike again!

 I wish I could just turn my brain OFF at night. Sometimes I think of numbers and end up doing random math in my head, and when I try to think about what I was counting, I can't remember it at all. Funny thing about that is, I can NOT do math well at all during the day. It's almost like I have to lay down, close my eyes, and picture it in my head. Probably more about me than you wanted to know, but if you're reading this... maybe you did want to know? Hmmm...

I've been in a very selfish mood lately. I guess more so than normal. I can't focus on a damn thing right now, and it's really starting to get to me. It's also affecting my relationships with other people because my attention span is non-existent. I tend to go into my own little world and not come out for awhile. It could be the winter weather, hormone changes, or just a little bout of depression, but I will be VERY glad when it's over. Just tired of being so lost inside my head right now.

Luckily Keaton has been a nice distraction. His newest 'milestones' include waving at everything (especially Casey!), and we're about 99% sure he said "Hi" today. It was very clear, 2 or 3 different times. I thought I heard him say "baby" the other day while looking at a picture book, but he babbles a lot so I won't really quote him until I hear it again. He didn't have the greatest weekend, and was pretty fussy during the days, especially in the early mornings. He didn't sleep well last night, again. I hope it's just another tooth coming in or something, but he's had one day each week where he wakes up every hour or two and has a hard time going back to sleep. Which brings me back to the beginning of this entry... I can't fall asleep right away, so the cycle is pretty much like this:

Go to bed at 9:30ish. Get distracted by TV or computer. Turn them off and close my eyes around 10:30ish. Toss. Turn. Start to drift off. Keaton wakes up and will not go back to sleep for ~30 minutes or more. Crawl back in bed after he's asleep, and start the toss/turn cycle again. Sometimes I get about 3-4 more hours of sleep before Keaton wakes up again.

This is how things have gone for a little while now, especially when he has a bad teething day or two. I think the 'swiss cheese-style' sleep is starting to affect my brain.

Well I think that's at least a portion of what's on my mind right now, so let's hope it's enough to let my brain rest for a bit. :) Here goes nothin'.

-Ash

So Long Sofa

We desperately need a new couch. Okay, that's a little over-dramatic (but then it is ME writing this, so you should not be surprised!). Our couch was owned by a former Grad student in the Chemical Engineering Department. We got it for fifty bucks, which you really can't beat when you are a broke college student. We had heard things about its past which were a bit unflattering, but we didn't care at the time. Now, though, the thing is on its last leg, and I'm happy to say good riddance.

First of all, it's YELLOW. We found a cover big enough to fit it and cover up some of the ugly, but it is a pain in the gluteus maximus to put on, and I have broken a sweat doing so. Secondly, it is probably the deepest couch I have ever seen. My Mom and I have both gotten stuck on it. Like it's a huge rectangle of quicksand and all you can see are our little feet sticking out. I remember getting stuck on it once while I was pregnant and home alone, and I started to panic a little bit because I could literally not get out of it without rolling two times! The over-sized cushions shift a lot, so the three on the back move forward and down, pushing the seat cushions forward. This can create a little 'black hole' in the center, which is almost impossible to get out of. It also immediately jacks up the couch cover. We have to readjust it a few times a week, and the minute you sit down on it and get up again, it's a mess. Time for a change!

No one is going to want this thing, unless they enjoy recovering furniture or they want to own a couch the size of a Buick. But I guess if someone is desperate for furniture like we once were, maybe a free, yellow, over-sized, over-stuffed one will hit the spot. Any takers? (I will not hold my breath.) ;)

Naked couch, complete w/'black hole' and patch!

-Ash

My Favorite Blood Spatter Analyst

If anyone reading this has never watched the show Dexter, now is the time to get off your keister and Netflix/Blockbuster/illegally download it. It is seriously one of the best shows I have ever seen, and it gets better every season. Granted, Casey and I just finished Season 4 tonight, and will have to wait awhile as we don't get Showtime to watch Season 5, but if that season is anything like the last one, it will be worth the wait!

I will do my best not to give anything away, just in case you haven't seen it.. I tried to explain the show to my mother-in-law recently, and found myself saying things that sounded totally off the wall, like, "You really end up feeling for a serial killer." I understand why she looked at me like I was crazy, but the writing on this show is so good, you actually root for the guy! Every season I have watched so far has amazing plot twists and turns. The best part is, for someone like Casey who can normally see the end coming a mile away, I don't think he's ever predicted how things would turn out. If stupid-ass Billy Bush hadn't interviewed one of the characters and revealed what happened to them in Season 4, I would have totally been shocked... instead I had to walk around, knowing the whole time (and keeping it from Casey). The best part about this show is, you really don't see it coming! They had me guessing up to the last 5 minutes... which made me more nervous because I was thinking, "How are they going to pull this off?" But they did. And they always do. Amazing writing, I tell ya.

The show was so intense for me, my hands and feet would literally sweat while we watched it. Casey thinks I'm crazy- and maybe I am- but I really got into it. If you can stomach fake blood (and not a horrible amount, all things considered...), nudity, and strong language *especially by Dexter's sister Deb*, I highly recommend this series.

So now I wait. Hopefully Billy Bush will keep his mouth shut in the meantime. :)

-Ash

PS: I will never look at John Lithgow the same way again.

4 Quick Things...

1) Keaton pulled himself up from sitting to standing today while in his Pack N Play! And better yet, I got it on video!! I'll post it sometime soon. :-D

2) For the 2nd time this week, someone thought Keaton was a girl. Awkward! Maybe it's the long eyelashes? Who knows. Annoying, though! I've heard people say he was a 'pretty boy'... this is a new one.

3) Keaton slept really well last night- he woke up around 10:30ish and ate (which was strange) but then slept until 5. He stayed awake for a little over an hour, and then didn't wake up again until almost 9! We had to skip walking at the mall today because of it, but I'm always glad when he gets extra sleep!

4) I almost got side-swiped by a cop today! He was in the right lane and started drifting into my lane. For a second I thought, "Do I honk at a cop?" but luckily he realized what he was doing and nodded at me to apologize. Again, awkward!

And now you're up to date.

-Ash

11 months

Keaton, now officially 11 months old, is taking a nap right now. Thank goodness. And while I should be doing laundry/dishes/etc., I decided to blog. Priorities, right? I know. But I find myself totally worn out after Keaton's swimming lesson this morning (which may be more of a workout for me than him). I'm also at a loss of what to make for dinner this evening, so blog it is.

The night before last was no bueno. Keaton is apparently getting another tooth... that makes 7. I think. It could be 8 now- he's really an overachiever in that department, yet I'm lucky if I can peek in his mouth now- he's pretty skeptical of anything going that direction. But anyway, he woke up once every 1 to 1.5 hours on Monday night. I was so exhausted yesterday that I didn't get dressed until almost 5 p.m., to which I thought, 'What is the point?'... it's amazing how much better you can feel by just changing clothes, though. I need to keep that in mind when I have a day where I can't get motivated. Last night was much better- he only woke up once, to eat. That's fairly normal for him. I still miss the days of getting even 6 straight hours of sleep, though. Okay, enough whining.

I can't believe he's 11 months old. I'm not sure how many times I've said that I can't believe he'll be one next month, but really, it's true. I got his owl-themed party invitations in the mail on Monday, and sent them out today. We have most of the party details ready, and look forward to our families coming up for the big event. I found some super cute Owl cupcakes that I'm going to attempt to make as well. Here's a pic of what I want to do- whoo (get it? whooo?) knows if they'll turn out like this at all. (Lame joke... but you're used to it.) I hope my decorating skills come into play and they turn out as cute as the ones in the picture.

I have a bit of a love/hate relationship with this age and stage right now. The good parts: He is starting to be able to communicate well, and can usually let me know what he wants pretty quickly. He's much more mobile, and can play by himself a lot of the time (unless he's really fussy, in which case he prefers to be in my lap, or at least holding onto me while he stands up). He LOVES swimming, and especially splashing in the water. He is learning to push off the wall (head above water, of course), and last week he even tried blowing bubbles, which was so cute! He really enjoys feeding himself, and actually gets frustrated when he's not able to now (if we don't have finger food and he has to eat from a spoon). He's starting to nap a bit longer, especially in the afternoons. Yay! On the other hand, some things are a bit more difficult: He's becoming very opinionated and independent. He doesn't like to sit in one place for long, and tries to roll off things: the changing pad, bed, or couch are his favorite. He thinks it's a game (esp. w/Daddy) and he nearly gives me a heart attack every time the tries it. He thinks it's funny when I say "No!", especially when he throws food or toys out of his high chair. He's very attracted to things he shouldn't be, like cords, electrical outlets, computers, etc. Typical curious kid. I think the hardest part right now is learning how to discipline him at this age. I think it's tougher on me than it is on him.

The nice part is, this is just a stage. It will pass, and the next one will have plenty of new and exciting (scary) things that come with it. It is nice to know so many other Moms that are going through this as well. We will get through it! I will try not to get so overwhelmed, and try to ask for help more often if I get that way. Hopefully the next month will bring more sleep, more words, less teething troubles, the use of a sippy cup, and maybe a few independent steps. Whoo knows what else. ;)

-Ash

Go Go Gadget- Motivate!!

35 minutes of cleaning, and I have to take a break. Our kitchen looks like a bomb went off... I'm slowly getting it to look decent again. Veeerrrrry slooooooowly.

A few random things tonight. First, I would like to go off on a tiny tangent about 'Talkative Guy' at our local movie rental establishment. I really seem to befriend the strangest people sometimes. I know he talked to me the first time when I was pregnant, and I didn't remember speaking to him until long after Keaton was born. Maybe it was the hormone-induced state I was in after just having a child, but I totally blocked meeting him out of my memory. Until the time we went in to exchange a movie, and he struck up a conversation with us about a movie where people became zombies and started killing everyone, and how he and his friends have a plan if that were ever to happen, and even have a storage unit somewhere nearby that they would go to to hide out. He talked about this for a good 5 minutes as we were trying to politely exit the building. But it never fails... I always go in and he always starts talking to me about very random things. Today it was a 26 lb turkey. He is funny, and nice, but I really have a hard time getting my movie and getting the heck out of there. Anyway, yeah... that's enough of that.

I had a thought today about how mobile my kid is now... changing his diaper and/or clothes is really like nailing jello to a wall. I have to put him on the floor or in the crib now to try to contain him, since he seems to want to jump off the changing pad now. It's wearing me out!! Not only that, but he's really gotten into the bad habit of throwing things when he doesn't want them- sippy cup, toys, binkies out of the crib...food... this morning he decided he would not let me feed him with a spoon, so he grabbed a handful of oatmeal and started shoving it in his mouth. This went okay for a few minutes, until he decided he was done eating it, and threw a big, sticky handful onto the floor. It reminded me for a second of a monkey hurling poo. He was highly amused; I was not. I thought I cleaned him up well enough, but I later found chunks of oatmeal in his hair. This part of parenthood is interesting. I want him to explore and have fun, and I realize he's learning, but he also gets this really ornery smile on his face sometimes when I tell him 'no'. Fun times ahead, people! (Sigh). I need a nap.

I had so much more on my mind earlier. If I could have blogged while driving, I would have. But now I'm home, sitting in the dining room, prolonging my procrastination. I've got to clean, but all I want to do is sit, and fill out birthday invitations, and veg. Not tonight... I took today 'off' and I have a lot to do. And so, off I go to do it. More later...

-Ash

Flour Frustration

Today has not gone the way I thought it would.

I got up this morning and went in to check on Keaton, only to accidentally wake him up. He ended up going back to sleep about 30 minutes before we were supposed to leave for mall walking, so I decided to nap with him and skip the walk. After an hour or so, we got up, got dressed, and headed out to my haircut appointment. That part went well. Then we drove to the grocery store so I could get beer and self-rising flour to make Beer Bread. I knew I couldn't go to Walmart b/c they don't sell beer, so we went to Jewel-Osco. I grabbed the beer (Guiness, for Casey) and headed to the flour aisle. Out of all of the selections of flour, they did not have ANY that was self-rising! The employees were even surprised that it wasn't there... so I decided to go elsewhere. I pulled the shopping cart up to my car, and attempted to unhook Keaton from the shopping cart seat... but he was stuck. The latch would not budge. I stood out in the cold for forever trying to get him unlatched, but nothing worked. Finally, I had to try and stand him up in the seat, bend his legs back a little bit, and pull him out. Luckily that worked, because I didn't want to go back in the store and say, "My kid is stuck in your shopping cart." I was flustered at this point, so I carried Keaton over to put the shopping cart back in the corral (I always put it back, I hate when people just leave them stranded in the middle of the parking lot!) but the cart slammed into the middle of the corral, so an employee who was working outside noticed us and got visibly frustrated with me. He said he'd take care of the cart, which was nice, but I noticed his attitude and it made me even more angry. Whatever.

I get Keaton strapped into his car seat, and we head for Walmart for the self-rising flour. I turn the corner, only to hear the clang of beer bottles... they tumbled out of the grocery bag and hit the door. Could have been worse. So I get to Walmart a few minutes later, and finally find a parking space. I forgot about the beer bottles, and opened Keaton's door; Beer bottles come rolling at me, and luckily I grabbed them before they hit the asphalt. Then I realize Keaton has fallen asleep. Poor guy... I hate getting him in and out of the car (which is another reason why I went to Jewel-Osco, thinking I could get everything in one trip...)... so I decide to forget the whole thing and come home.

Once again, the beer bottles fall over. This time it was loud enough when they hit the door that it woke Keaton up. Luckily he went back to sleep, but they tried rolling out at me again when we got home and I opened the door to get Keaton out. I am happy to report that the Guiness is safe and sound on my kitchen counter, and Keaton is napping in his crib. Things could have been a whole lot worse. I just realize that when one thing after another after another happens to me, I get really flustered and it's like a domino effect. Sometimes I wonder if my frustration amplifies that.

The Beer Bread can wait. My kid is sleeping and we're safe and warm in the house. Sometimes it takes blogging to put things in perspective. :)

-Ash

Little Fish

Keaton started his second swimming session at the YMCA this morning. We were very excited that our new instructor, Becky, has a very structured class. Keaton tried blowing bubbles in the water today (something he's never even showed interest in before), and he learned to push off the wall with his feet- the best part about that was that after 2 times, he was doing it on the count of 3, which was great!! I love this age right now. Minus the fact that changing his diaper and/or clothes is nearly impossible now since he's so mobile, it's neat to see how much he takes in and to watch him think things through. He is getting very opinionated, and even shakes his head 'no' sometimes. It's cute right now, until he learns how to say No... then we're in for it.

I'm attempting to plan his first birthday party now, which is proving to be a bit more involved than I ever thought it could be. He has 3 friends (unless I'm forgetting someone else) with birthdays around the same time, so February is going to be one busy month! We look forward to having family come up for the occasion. Now I just have to figure out where it's going to be... hopefully I can come up with a plan soon... I have just over a month before I have a one year old!! HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE??

Here's a picture of the future Doc:

-Ash

Goals

A few goals for myself for 2011:

• Eat better and take better care of myself. This includes cooking more, planning meals better, and getting regular exercise so I can keep up with my kid and actually have energy. I need to also keep up with appointments to the doctor and dentist for all three of us.
• Be more responsible. I have needed to do this for a long time, but it occurred to me recently that now that I have a kid, I need to stop acting like one. Spending time on Facebook and doing things that are really not as important take up way too much of my time right now, and I need to set a good example for Keaton so he can become a responsible adult someday. I just need to get there before he does. ;)
• I would really like to have straight teeth by the time I'm 30, or at least be on my way there. I haven't been to the orthodontist since middle school, so who knows what I'm in store for- but I would love to finally do it since my teeth have bugged me for so long. 
• If possible, I would like to go back to school this year. I need to get to a point where I'm comfortable leaving Keaton with someone else, but it will be good for both of us, I think. It will also allow me to try and balance things a little better at home, because time management will be key.

That is probably enough for now. I just thought it would be better to make a list so I could reference it later and hopefully stick to it. Feel free to hold me accountable. ;)

-Ash